I wanted to speak on something that has been sitting on my chest for a minute but Monogamy is played out. I blame fairy tales for this. When we’re growing up, we read all these stories about young boys and young girls falling in love and getting married, when in reality, it doesn’t work like that. How is it possible to find one person who you fall in love with and live with them for the rest of your life without your eyes swaying to and fro? What do you think?
As humans, we’re very selfish creatures. We’re always thinking ‘What if?’ “What if she had a bigger bum…? What if she didn’t fart at night?” I feel like there’s always something that stops us from being happy with our relationship because we’re always thinking that there could be something out there that's better for us. But people still try to live up to an ideal that was fed to them as a young person, thinking that it’s the be-all and all when the people in the stories are made up. The characters are meant to sell us a dream but that dream, in reality, doesn’t exist.
We change our mind as time goes on. So one minute you might like eggs and the next minute, you might like olives. So once you get to know the person you thought you were going to spend the rest of your life with and you’ve been through different experiences with them, it might turn out that you’re not meant to be. People change over time and humans have urges. Sometimes you’re not even expecting to go out and meet someone who turns your head but they do, due to lack of fulfillment in your current relationship. It doesn’t mean that you don’t still love and appreciate the person that you’re with but you're still left thinking, 'What if...?"
Now am I saying that I want the person that I’m in a relationship with to cheat on me or that I want an open relationship? No, I don’t. I want to be with one person but I feel like I see a relationship in a different light. It’s not just about falling in love or being in lust. It's about working with someone who has a common goal in order to create a better life for the both of you. But at the same time, people mess up. We’re humans. Sometimes that means people make mistakes. Relationships end prematurely because there’s only so much one person can take. The issue comes when you do something behind someone's back because it’s harder to build on broken trust.
I’d rather find someone who respects me and I respect them and we can work together to create something beautiful. Breaking up and finding someone else isn’t the end of the world. We can’t all have that happily ever after that we see on movie screens or read between the pages of a book because life isn’t as black and white as that.